The Great Presidential Bake-off

When I stop to consider who I want to vote for in a presidential election, culinary prowess is not something I generally look for in a candidate, yet somehow over the past week both Republicans and Democrats have decided to make various food related faux pas and scandals that I found both amusing and disturbing.

Originally, I had supported Barack Obama. I liked that he had sort of an outsider feel to him and I liked his stance on the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. Over time, however, I realized that Obama doesn’t have a single concrete or realistic plan to fix anything that doesn’t pertain to the military. The man is an eloquent speaker and a convincing figurehead for the “hope and change” platform he seems to be running on, but his policies on anything other than the war in Iraq are either non-existent or hopelessly vague.

I never fully warmed up to Hillary Clinton, and I still haven’t. Having lived in a state where she was a senator, I know her track record well enough to know that her saying something and her actually following through with her statements rarely go hand in hand, but she still generally makes the right decisions. I also had a huge mental problem that I didn’t want all the presidents in my lifetime to be so closely connected. It went from Regan to his vice president Bush, to Clinton, then to Bush’s son, and then it could go to another Clinton. That shows little to no progress at all and makes Clinton and Bush almost sound more like brand names than they already are.

While I don’t agree with all her policies (her stance on the role of the military being the biggest disagreement), in my heart I know she is the best person for the job. While she might not stick to the policies she has outline in part or even in full, at least she has taken the time to craft a legitimate answer and seems to be ready to go right to work the moment she is elected. If you ask Hillary a question, you get an answer. If you ask Barack a question, you get a wonderful sounding sound bite that, if you are lucky, has a fragment of an answer.

It is now more than ever clear that Barack really only tells people what they want to hear. Despite swearing up and down that he is not an elitist, this very conceit shows how woefully out of touch he is with common working class Americans. You can shout from the heavens all you want about hope and change, but without any plans for me to see, you are just a person with a pretty face that people have thrown a lot of money behind in order to further the cause of not only the patriarchy but the aristocracy as well.

In a debate this past week, the first question posed to Obama was regarding a statement he made the week prior where he made the assumption that small town voters were bitter. ABC’s Sam Donaldson noted that such a statement could be considered as being filled with elitist sentiment.

Obama defended the charge in typical sound bite fashion by bringing up a statement Hillary Clinton made almost in passing in 1992. During Bill’s first term Hillary said that she had no plans to “stay home and bake cookies.” Obama said that such a statement could also be considered elitist. And it could be considered as such, but only by someone very ignorant.

Hillary’s statement was feminist if anything, and I dare say even humanist and completely realistic. Besides, when in the past century has the first lady even stayed home long enough to bake cookies? The first lady is technically a foreign dignitary and is perfectly capable in helping to shape policies. Even in the joking context Clinton used, it was clear to all but a select few people who heard it as being colloquial in nature. If Hillary had said “I am so busy that I am hiring someone to make cookies,” then that would be an elitist statement.

While what Hillary said could not in any way be considered elitist and offended only a few asshats, Obama’s statement was as elitist as you can get. Obama has effectively offended half of the population of the United States by calling them out on their voting habits. In my eyes, all the negative press Obama has been getting on the subject is deserved and no one’s fault but his own. Also, unlike John Kerry who could blame his “if you are poor and uneducated you get shipped to Iraq” slip up on a speech writer, Obama made this statement up on the fly. He clearly can’t fire himself, so he is stuck having to back pedal.

Also, Hillary actually does make cookies. They aren’t anything special, but they are certainly delicious.

The Republicans on the other hand have created what might be one of the most ridiculous recipe related scandals in years. It is also a strange case of plagiarism involving someone I dislike almost as much as the Republican Party: Rachel Ray.

On John McCain’s website, an intern posted recipes that were lauded as being family favourites and created by McCain’s wife. Within a week of the posting, the creators of McCain’s website were slapped with a cease and desist order from Food Network claiming plagiarism and copyright infringement. Three of the recipes were either in part or in whole taken from the Food Network website and the celebrity chefs who created them.

Although they contained slight variations, McCain’s recipes for Passion Fruit Moose and Ahi Tuna with Cabbage Slaw, Pasta, and Turkey Sausage had their cooking instructions and ingredients mostly copied from Giada DeLaurantis and Mario Batali, respectively. A third recipe for Rosemary Chicken Breasts was copied word for word from Rachel Ray.

Within 48 hours of receiving the notification, the intern was fired and the recipes pulled, which further begs the question, if you want to prove you are a common person, why not just flat out provide links to recipes you like rather than lie about it? Oh, right. You are a Republican politician running for the presidency. McCain’s knowledge of these recipes is admittedly debatable, but whoever thought it was a good idea to run these as originals was deservedly fired.

I do have it on good authority, however, that McCain does make excellent frozen dinners, pizzas, and French fries that are available in grocery stores everywhere.